Play Beyoncé Choose Your Own Adventure Twitter Thread

Photo: Green Chyna/Twitter

Twitter Threads, on the Whole, Can Be Exhausting-Hectorying, Multi-Tweet Throat Clearing From People Whose Point Point Better Be Summed Up Not all of me, though. Some of me are good. Some of me are, dare of Say, inspired. Such as this one:

The thread, created by @cornnyassbitch, is a game where you are cast as beyoncé’s assistant and your objection is to not mes up and get fired. Think of it as a choose your own adventure novel but in tweets. Each Tweet Presents A SCENARIO and the Reply Tweets Are Your Options. SO, for Example, Beyoncé Has Some Downtime. Do you recommend swimming, painting, or drinking wine and gossiping? (Spoiler Alert: Don’t Let Her Go Swimming. You, Like Me, Will Be Fired Promptly and Realize Immediately How Moronic Your Choice Was. Wet Hair? Before A Performance? Idiot.)

The game is at once fun – i played several times this morning after initially getting for my stupid swimming choice – as well as impressive. Some Real Thoughts Went into Creating The Game and Its Multitude of Answer Branches. (The Level of Efffort is Remination of Another Twitter Bit Where a user secretly tween the words to queen’s “Bohemian rhapsody” Slowly over one tweet at a time and thatn revealed the gag only when Completed so the song COULD BE READ IN FULL BY READING THE FIRST WORD OF EACH OF HER TWEETS IN REVENDS. It was, to be technical, not a true thread, but, hey, close Enough.) Each Tweet Also has a Photo to go with it. SO COPE YOU CHOOSE TO FaceTime Blue Ivy, you see Bey Facetiming with Blue Ivy. Its delightful detailed.

This isn’t the first time we’ve seen a choose your own adventure on twitter. The Style, and Its Many Variations, has been around for a while. Here’s One From Buzzfeed CEO Jonah Perretti Back in 2010. For this game, tweets weren’t threaded. Instead, you’d have to copy and paste a truncated bit.ly link for each selection you made. Here’s 23-Step Game From 2015 that is used individual accounts for eAch Possible Answer. (Each Choice in a Tweet Waled Have a Specific Tagged Account You’d CLICK TO MAKE YOUR CHOICE.) Here’s one from Earlier this year that opted to use polls instead of thweets. Here’s one that isn’t quite so famous but is ALSO from this week where you can Marry off your fove daughters a la jane austen’s Pride and prey. All of which only serves to make the beyoncé game better becauses it balls all the iterations of this twitter we’ve seen before.

Plus it’s just nice to be able to enjoy a thread where nobody is lying to you. The most recent viral threads involved men peddling bs stories about like scamming an ms-13 gang out of some heroin-that tweeter, shane morris, eventual camey clean his lies claimg he fered for his safety- A man who Met His Future at the Gersyard of Her Murder family AFTER AFTER PLACTLY PLACED FLOWERS ON THE MURDERER’S WOMEN.

None of that Today, though. TODAY YOU field Beyoncé’s assistant and you must not get fired no matter what. Pro Type: She Prefer White Lighting Over Blue. Godspeed.