This Is the Worst Thing to Do After Being Ghosted – ryan

Dr. Marisa T. CohenPhD, LMFT, is a relationship expert at the dating app Hily. After leaving her full-time career in higher education, she went on to pursue a master’s in marriage and family therapy. She also holds a certificate in sex therapy from the University of Michigan Sexual Health Certificate Program and has received clinical training in Prepare Enrich, the Gottman Method Couples Therapy and Emotionally Focused Therapy.

“Being ghosted can be a very painful experience,” Cohen tells me. “It’s important to check in with yourself and identify your needs.” She recommends taking time to connect with friends and loved ones who can help you process and heal, and being patient with yourself. “There’s no set time in which you need to ‘get over it,’” she tells me. “Allow yourself to feel the emotions and go at your own pace.”

What shouldn’t you do after being ghosted? According to Cohen, it’s important to avoid pushing for closure—no matter how tempting. “If you want to check in with your former date to get a better sense of what may have led to the end of the relationship, go ahead. However, reach out once to ask for clarification. If the person doesn’t respond, they’re not likely to, even with additional follow ups. Don’t chase the person.” She continues, “As difficult as it may feel, the silence may be all of the ‘closure’ you get. Repeatedly reaching out may only intensify the emotions and frustration for you.”