A woman was left horrified after she accidentally told her sister’s fiancé a huge secret that could end up ruining their upcoming wedding – but others say she did the right thing
Keeping secrets from your partner before your wedding is not a good idea.
Relationships are built on trust, so keeping secrets and hiding things from your loved ones is generally considered to be a bad thing. Of course, there are times when you might have to tell a white lie, but for the most part, honesty really is the best policy – especially when it comes to your feelings about the relationship.
One bride-to-be has learned firsthand how important it is to be honest after she asked her sister to keep a secret about her upcoming wedding, only to find that her sibling had “accidentally” blabbed to her future brother-in-law. The bride’s sister confessed in a post on Reddit, where she said the secret just “slipped out” when she was talking to her sister’s fiancé.
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The woman explained that a few weeks ago, she overheard her sister talking to her mum about how she “wasn’t sure if she wanted to go through with the wedding” because she was worried she and her partner might be “rushing into things”. The bride made her sister swear that she wouldn’t say anything, and she agreed – until it came out accidentally.
She wrote: “Her fiancé came over while she was out running errands, and we were just chatting casually when he asked me if I thought they were moving too fast. Without thinking (and because I’m apparently incapable of keeping secrets), I blurted out something like, ‘Well… you’re not the only one who feels that way.’ His face dropped immediately.”
When the bride got home, she was confronted by her fiancé about what she had said, and the pair have since been having “serious conversations behind closed doors”. The woman is concerned that she may have ruined the couple’s marriage before they even tied the knot, and her sister is “furious” with her for spilling her secret.
She added: “I felt bad, but on the other hand, that (could have been) my opinion and fear. Honestly? Fair enough. I did have doubts about her engagement when her fiancé asked me for advice. Now their relationship might be in trouble.”
Commenters on the post were split. Many said that it wasn’t her place to spill her sister’s secret, but others argued that getting cold feet before a wedding is common and that these feelings should be discussed instead of brushed under the rug.
One person said: “Just face it, you spilled the beans. That’s all there is to it. Next time, tell what you really feel, not repeat something someone told you in confidence. Even if, ultimately, that was a good thing for them, that breach of trust will be hard to recover from.”
Another added: “They both feel rushed, and they’re both talking to other people about it. That push was unintentional but necessary.” A third stated: “While it might seem like a bad thing, you just forced them to be honest to each other, which they should’ve been in the first place. If they’re meant to be, talks about it aren’t going to break them up. If not, you’ve done your part, maybe they’re avoiding a mistake.”
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