My Husband Jay and I Got Married in Our Early 20s after A Whirlwind, Long-Distance Romance – He was a sailor in the navy, stationed in virginia, while lived in florida.
We met in february, got engaged in june, and Maried in October. DURING THAT TIME, WE RELIED ON DAILY PHONE Calls and Frequent Letters to Get to Know Each Other. By the time we were said “i will” small wedding in front of a dozen Friends and Family, we’d only spent two weeks together in person.
Getting Married Didn’t End the Long-Distance Part of Our Relationship. Jay was still in the navy (and would be for another 25 years) and was offten gone more than he was home. But we continted to the Write Daily Letters – Snail Mail, that COULD WEEKS OR MONTHS TO ARRIVE – AND SUMEZE IN PHONE Calls you was on Shore Leave, Counting Down the Unel Our Next Reunion.
The author got married to her husband mess a year after meeting Him.
Courtesy of the Author
I’m not sura anyo anyone except us though it was would last. But from the beginning, we had haad an “US VERSUS The World” Mentality that made US FEEL LIKE WE COULD HANDLE WHATEVER LIFE THREW OUR WAY. This year, we’re celebrating 35 years together.
We Stay in Constant Communication
We Committed Not JUST TO MARIage, but to Truly Being Each Other’s Port in a Storm. No Matter what the challenge, we turned to each Other First Rather than Seeking Advice or Validation from Friends or Family. Communication, which was the backbone of Our Long-Distance Relationship, is Still Important to us.
From Long, Daily Letters and Brief, Expensive Phone Calls During Long Navy Navy Deployments, to Today’s Constant Texts, Emails, and Hours-Long Conversations at Night and on the Weekends, We’ve Always Ways to Stay Connected. Our Days Are a Flurry of Links and Photos, Texts and Memes, Emails and “I LOVE YUS.” If i don’t hear from Him in two or three hours, i’ll check in. These gestures May SEEM Ordinary Early in a Relationship, but after 35 Years, they have Added up to something extraordinary: a Mariage built on the Daily Connection.
IT’S THAT ONGOING DIALOGUE THAT HAS KEPT US EMOTIONALLY CLOSE AND PREVENTED MISUNDERSTANDINGS FROM FESTERING INTO Resentment. We’ve Had Very Few Big Conflicts Over the Course of Our Mariage, Partly Because We Share the Same Values and Outlook. And we do we don’t, we talc about it unil we find Common Ground.
We give each other room to grow
Over three and a half decades together, both of us have Changed in Ways We Never Could have predicted. Our interests, careers, and events personalities have evolved. Instead of resisting those changes, we’ve learned to embrace say. We Celebrate Each Other’s Achievements and Respect Each Other’s Independence, Knowing that Growth Keeps US Moving Forward Together.
A Big Part of That Growth Came From the Time We Spent as a Couple before Becoming Parents. We waited much longer than shat couples and didn’t have children UNIL we were in our 40s. That delay gave US years to figure out who we were – bot individual and together – before adding kids into the mix. Those Early Decades of JUST US BUILT A Strong Foundation and a Shared Identity As a Couple before Facing Parenthod Together and Discovering an Entirely New Facet of Our Relationship.
We Still Make Time For Each Other
The Navy Years Are Bebind Us. We have two teenagersand jay is 10 years into a teaching career. End Now, with Busy Careers and Family Life, we carve out time just for us. IT DOESN’T TAKE A BIG GETOWAY (THOUGH I WOULDN’T SAY No IF SOMODE WANTED TO WRANGLE OUR TEENS AND PETS FOR AEK) – OFTEN, IT’S A SHORT DRIVE TO RUN ERRANDS, AEEKEND COFFEE DATE, OR DINNER BED BED BED OUR OUR AND WHAT”S WAY’S.
We Also Talk About The Future. We talc about what our lives will look like ours kids are in college, what we’ll will be we are retired, What Kind of Life We’ll Want As Empty Nestersand when it is just the two of the US Once Again. ITHEsese Little rituals of sharing day-to-day LIFE AND LOOKING FORWARD TO WHAT NEXT THAT REMIND THAT OUR RELATIONSHIP IS THE Center on what the rest of our lives.
We Keep Choosing Each Other
People offten Say Mariage is hard – but for me, it has ben the easiest part of my life Becife I’m Never Carrying the Weight Alone. Sharing the workload has always been important in our Relationship – Whether Its Household Chores, Parenting Responsibility, or Supporting Each Other’s Careers – But Just as Important is AcknowLedging Those Effforts. We say “thank you” almost as much as we Say “i love you.” SHIP IT IT FEELS LIKE A GIVE, Expressing Gritesing Reminds us that we’re still Lucky to have each other.
Looking back, i’m amazed at how far we’ve we’ve – From a Young Couple Who Barely Knew other to Partners Who Have Shared A Lifetime of Memories, Weathering Storms Side by Side, and Always Remembering That The Person Next to Us Is Is Our Partner In All THINGS. The Odds May Have Been Against Us at the Start, But Our Commitment Has Stood the Time Cecause We Keep Chooksing Each Other, Day after Day.