On a moist Saturday night, a tiny audience gathered at the Public Theater to gape D. Woods, a pale member of the slack-aughts lady team Danity Kane, stage a one-lady checklist. The venue wasn’t sold out, however among the many ladies folks, couples, and two males seated across the stage’s perimeter were diehard fans of the artist, whose trusty title is Wanita Denise Woodgett; one lady proudly boasted that she purchased ten tickets for her guests.
The day sooner than, correct over a mile away at the federal courthouse in Manhattan, a felony expert for Sean “Diddy” Combs, who’d stumbled on D. Woods and the leisure of the team on the MTV reality checklist Making the Band, had given his closing argument to defend the hip-hop mogul against intercourse-trafficking charges — including accusations that he drugged a couple of girls folks and compelled them into marathon intercourse parties he called “Freak Offs.” “I wonder, did one thing transpire?” one lady sitting at a candlelit desk with three guests requested me sooner than showtime. “Is there one thing she would settle on to allotment?”
Someone who purchased a impress hoping for an fable of what went down between Combs and Danity Kane would maintain been disappointed. The checklist, titled My Residing Room Self, was more of a overall coming-of-age-in-the-industry legend: Woods sang and danced as her childhood self playing the feature of Pinocchio in a faculty recital sooner than reworking into a bright-partying adult. She carried an empty bottle of Don Julio by means of the audience shouting “shots!” and shook her ass in see-by means of booty shorts, an audience of masked males projected onto a show camouflage camouflage at the succor of her. Later, she danced as if preventing an invisible opponent, then fell silent whereas audio played of Combs’s pale bodyguard claiming that his boss talked about he deliberate to drug and pimp out the Danity Kane ladies. The checklist’s devices weren’t repeatedly subtle, admire when an “interior declare” on the show camouflage camouflage suggested Woods to “face about a of those gruesome truths” and stare inward. The audience, clearly moved, gave her a standing ovation.
Just a few days sooner than the checklist, I met D. Woods in a Novel Jersey resort room, where she spread out concerning the painful experiences with Combs and Danity Kane that she processed by means of her efficiency. (Lawyers for Combs, who’s denied all prison and civil allegations against him, did not retort to a seek facts from for observation). Tears streamed down her face as she spoke about feeling suicidal after Combs fired her from the team in 2008 and he or she struggled to manufacture music. Woods has not been following her pale boss’s prison trial, however no matter the final result, she’s not liable to maintain fun. As she set it: “I’m not obvious a guilty verdict would heal me.”
On auditioning for Making the Band:
I had danced for assorted artists admire Bow Wow, Snoop Dogg, and LeToya Luckett from Destiny’s Cramped one. I was at NYU and I would correct bound to auditions after I wasn’t at school. A producer I was working with persuaded me to take a gape at out for Making the Band. I didn’t have confidence I was going to be chosen for the team. I didn’t have confidence Puff liked my model. I’m curvy and I truly maintain a truly eclectic more or less style. I didn’t stare admire the ladies that I noticed him with: J.Lo, Naomi Campbell, Cassie, caramel complexions and straight hair parted down the center. I wasn’t admire, God, I hope I safe it, however I wasn’t going to be made a idiot of. Who wouldn’t need the approval of any individual admire him? I grew up on his music. I suggested him, “You’re admire a father figure.” He talked about, “Don’t insist that, child lady. I could per chance per chance successfully be more of a immense brother.” There was already ample accessible about his reputation. I knew concerning the so-called “Deplorable Boy curse,” where an artist could per chance per chance successfully be hot for a minute, however as soon as Puff was by means of with you, it’s over. I correct conception, It goes to’t be that noxious. It’s not going to happen to me.
On filming the checklist:
The producers would never insist us what we were strolling into. We didn’t know who we’d be seeing or the songs we’d be singing till we got to the studio and they handed us a lyric sheet. We didn’t know if we were going to be yelled at or within the occasion that they were going to insist, “Listed below are gifts.” We had no enter, a minimal of on the first album. Diddy absolute most sensible in actuality came around when the cameras were rolling or when it was some immense, noxious, upsetting moment. He would steadily insist us things admire, “Y’all ain’t nothing however a tax write-off to me.” “Y’all ain’t rate the shit within the bottom of my shoes.” I needed to safe in between him and Aubrey O’Day a couple of times for the interval of screaming suits when he was threatening to kick her out of the team. He obligatory us to call him “Daddy” at one point, and I talked about, “Absolutely not.”
On being body-shamed by Diddy:
In 2006, for the interval of week regarded as one of many checklist, he called me out in entrance of everyone about my body. We were doing a efficiency for NBA All-Famous particular person weekend and the stylists didn’t maintain my dimension. The entire dresses were zeroes, per chance twos. They raise about us in entrance of this tiny camera on Skype, and Puff is taking a gape at us. (Editor’s inform: In this episode, Diddy tells Woods, “What’s your abdominal taking a gape admire? You feeling a piece of thick? You’re admire a burger away.”) Afterwards, the producers were admire, “You don’t in actuality maintain a battle with one thing else, so we correct need the audience to mumble to you.” I was admire, “You don’t maintain to assemble a body scenario with me.”
From that point on, Puff would correct fabricate tiny throwaway feedback, admire, “Possibly lose five, ten more kilos.” I would maintain to maintain extra exercises on my maintain outside of those with the assorted ladies. One time he pulled me into the space of business to overview me and was admire, “Damn, what are you doing? Running on the treadmill with weights?” I’m muscular. I consider looking out to inform to him, “While you happen to in reality need me to slim down, I presumably shouldn’t flee. That’s correct going to manufacture my legs up.”
On the time Diddy allegedly threatened her:
We were promoting our first album and had a week off. My phone rang and it was Harve Pierre, who I had more or less a fab relationship with. I’m admire, “Howdy, what’s up, Harve?” and he’s admire, “I got Puff on the line.” Click. Then he correct starts screaming at me. He’s in his irate mode, asserting, “Don’t insist ‘No’ to me!” I didn’t know what he was talking about. I tried to make employ of aloof, soothing tones. It looks he obligatory us to assemble at an NFL kickoff whereas we were off, and the assorted ladies had talked about no. “This ain’t what that that it is possible you’ll per chance maintain to maintain, child lady,” he talked about. “I shelve folk for only this. I know where you are residing.” I was at my mama’s dwelling in Austell, Georgia. I was admire, Does he maintain surveillance? When I got off the phone, I trusty now called a felony expert I knew and talked about, “Salvage me out of this contract, please.” He had already suggested me, “This is the worst contract I’ve ever seen in my lifestyles.” I correct didn’t see things getting any better. But the felony expert talked about, “If he doesn’t originate, it’s going to be in actuality bright.”
On being fired from Danity Kane:
I was in actuality gut-punched. He kicked Aubrey out first, after which he grew to change into to me and talked about, “I hear you ain’t so chuffed right here either. Matter of reality, that that it is possible you’ll per chance per chance bound too.” I called my felony expert, who talked about that now, Puff had verbally terminated the phrases of our settlement on-camera. Initially, I felt admire folk were angry at me because they conception I broke up their favourite band. The draw it was depicted on MTV, Aubrey and I were doing these extracurricular, self-indulgent things and not caring concerning the team effort. Heaps of folk were admire, “You correct walked out. You looked admire it didn’t even matter to you.”
I didn’t know who I could per chance per chance belief. Mase called and talked about, “So I heard you bought off your contract. How’d you maintain that?” I didn’t maintain his number saved and I didn’t know who I was in actuality talking to. I’ve had conferences with grand and influential folk where they ask, “What’s your relationship admire with Puff now?” I was procuring for administration and after having a lawful dialog with any individual, they stopped answering me. I alarmed about Puff’s affiliations with producers and directors. I’ve been about to maintain a monologue, and a casting director would insist, “What was it admire working with P. Diddy?”
On combating her psychological successfully being:
By 2012, I was suicidal. By 2017, I had deliberate it out. My checklist was originally called Disaster in Paradise, because I had photos of me on these seashores. I purchased a one-design impress to Cuba and didn’t intend to return. I silent maintain about a of my suicide notes. I wish to enjoy in strategies exactly what I was thinking and feeling. One in all my letters was one thing admire, “It looks or not it is not relevant what I give, nobody’s . They correct need Danity Kane or they’ve written me off. I’m a has-been. I’m a one-hit wonder.”
I assemble my tune “In point of fact feel Appropriate” within the checklist. “I know the shit I’ve been into currently / It ain’t correct, however how will you blame me? / That’s how I safe by / And as well you never stop to request from me how I’m doing / You never stare me in my eyes.” I was looking out to maintain a mettlesome face. Music and performing were the most traditional things I looked forward to, however even that was getting bright because there were so many roadblocks. Seeing Puff on TV and hearing his declare was triggering. I will’t stare at his face. He was piece of every other opponents checklist in 2018 called The Four. A chum of mine was on it. I obligatory to bolster her, however I couldn’t gape it. I couldn’t hear him consult with her the draw I heard him consult with me.
On residing within the shadow of Danity Kane:
I’ll put up one thing about an ingenious mission and the feedback are admire, “Y’all maintain to correct let bygones be bygones and give the fans that third album that we deserve.” I’m admire, “Ruin you deem I wish to be within the the same room with them?” I was doing Kandi Burruss’s checklist A Mother’s Esteem in 2013, correct across the time that Danity Kane attempted to maintain a reunion. They were all in L.A. and I was not, so it turned into a fable of, “Why isn’t D. Woods there?” I was correct admire, “I’m doing my maintain thing. I’m not going to forestall assorted projects to head and like at P.F. Chang’s with y’all.”
The final be conscious particular person I truly consult with is Aubrey. We bound inside of and exterior of being in touch with every assorted, however it undoubtedly is painful. There’s too famous between us. I’ve done so design more since Danity Kane that must be current and identified. I was currently on tour with Teddy Riley, and folk insist, “You’re correct a backup dancer now.” I was having the time of my lifestyles. But in some folk’s strategies, Danity Kane is the most traditional thing that I’m ever going to maintain.
On not being paid moderately for her work:
Our first album was No. 1 and it hit certified platinum. But we never noticed that money. How would you are feeling as soon as you happen to went into your job at Verizon Wi-fi and also you didn’t receives a commission for 19 years? In 2021, I got styles from Deplorable Boy that could per chance per chance give me succor the publishing rights to Danity Kane songs. I conception, Possibly Puff is popping over a brand fresh leaf. When I read the settlement, there was additionally an NDA. It was silencing in every design, form, and fetch. I had already began engaged on my checklist and conception, This is my legend. This is my ride. It’s my working out that Aubrey and I were the most traditional two Danity Kane participants who did not signal. Correct sooner than Cassie’s lawsuit dropped, in 2023, we received our first royalty compare. I didn’t even wish to ask why. It was for $8,000. That’s nothing when when compared with what we could per chance per chance’ve been making had we been getting paid from 2006–08. Of us stroll up to me on the road and focus on how they’re silent playing our music as soon as they’re within the gymnasium. I truly maintain tried to safe my money for years. At a obvious point, I truly maintain to decide up the reality that I made a truly costly mixtape that I gave away for free.
On hearing about Cassie’s lawsuit:
When the Novel York Cases published Cassie’s lawsuit, I was getting so many phone calls. My administration at the time were getting calls from ABC News and TMZ. My sister was getting phone calls. I was having bodily reactions to things resurfacing. I had knots in my abdominal and paranoia. I was having muscle spasms in my neck, my lower succor, and legs. I was in my home and André 3000’s flute album had attain out. I talked about, I’m correct going to flip my phone off and listen to to the music. The man I was relationship couldn’t tackle it. He ghosted me. I’m over right here in my home, not obvious if any individual’s going to return knocking on my door.
On Dawn Richard’s sexual-assault allegations against Diddy:
I had no thought. I conception Dawn grew to change into on me — it felt admire she was looking out to keep away with me and set herself entrance and heart. I didn’t realize why. I pulled her to the side one time and talked about, “If or not it is a long way foremost to mumble me, ‘I hate your guts,’ safe it off your chest. Because the 2 Sunless ladies folks, they wish us to be against every assorted. It’s us against them. They’re going to chunk us up and spit us out.” Having a gape succor, she was presumably in survival mode. I was taken aback she spoke out, however I wasn’t taken aback to listen to the allegations. Even with Cassie, I wasn’t taken aback. I deem he’s able to that. I’ve seen how he’s intimidated a room. I’ve seen him throw chairs at folk.
On how My Residing Room Self came collectively:
In 2012, I was looking out to manufacture an album that was introspective. I was admire, This is how I truly in actuality feel, however I don’t know if any one wants to listen to it. Most folk conception, What maintain or not it is a long way foremost to whinge about? You’re D. Woods. You had it lawful. And I got caught. I determined to focal point on acting gigs as a replacement. In 2018, I moved succor to Novel York, and the following one year, I landed a feature within the Off Broadway play for colored ladies who maintain regarded as suicide/when the rainbow is enuf. The approach of being so vulnerable onstage gave me the courage to jot down this checklist. So for the interval of the pandemic, when everyone had time, I labored on creating. I knew it was bigger than correct an album. I had visuals and monologues that I had been sitting on since 2012. I’ve performed about a variations of it since 2021. I was looking out to manufacture the checklist moderately more universal, for someone going by means of excessive-functioning sad. When that news came out about Cassie’s lawsuit, I was admire, “I’ve been looking out to mumble y’all, however you didn’t wish to deem me.” Now, per chance my ride could also be permitted.
On working by means of painful recollections:
One tune within the checklist is named “Goldmine,” about how Sunless males within the industry tackle Sunless ladies folks. It was a double entendre. I’m sitting on a gold mine, however they don’t need me to know my maintain rate. I’m additionally sitting on a gold mine, literally. They’re correct staring at my ass. As ladies folks, we maintain to proceed the chance originate. I will’t insist you that there’s no chance in hell that you are going to sleep with me, because I truly need us to maintain industry. You wish to maintain the looks to be like.
I came up with this video thought of one single shot that pans out to checklist me standing on an public sale block, painted in gold, surrounded by males with masks on. At the discontinuance, I safe up in my mattress, puzzled. I truly maintain assorted projects with a persona who has amnesia and retains waking up. I’ve been wondering, is there one thing that I don’t consider? What was my subconscious looking out to refer to with me? I declined an invite to a white safe collectively, however my body is reacting to hearing reports of girls folks being drugged. I was around those self same folk. I don’t know if I was repeatedly protected. We had sleep deprivation. We were in various hotels. I had noxious, gut emotions. As ladies folks, we’re taught to 2nd-wager ourselves for the sake of seeming polite and not bruising a particular person’s ego. A pale bodyguard did an interview about how Puff’s blueprint was to safe us strung out on medication and pimp us out. It’s a truly bright thing to enjoy in strategies.
On performing for the interval of Diddy’s trial:
On the one hand, I in actuality feel admire it’s God’s timing. On the assorted hand, I don’t need folk thinking I’m being opportunistic. I’ve been engaged on this for ten-ish years. I’ve been using my artwork to job my ride with out even realizing what I’m processing. My subconscious has been telling me to jot down a tune about it. I’m not intentionally asserting, “I’m going to chat about him.” In a supreme world, I would be doing a total assorted checklist that could per chance per chance showcase me.
I will’t wait till I am on the assorted side of all this. Possibly right here is what I maintain to maintain to jot down a brand fresh ride. I correct don’t wish to be in fear of his retaliation. We’re talking in this resort moderately than my dwelling because I don’t know what he’s able to. I haven’t even been following the trial. I don’t wish to be disappointed. I’m not obvious a guilty verdict will heal me. That will happen after I take a seat down to chat a couple of mission I’m doing, and there isn’t a demand about Puff.
This interview has been condensed and frivolously edited for readability.
