Heather Pearce, 31, and Her Husband Tom, 36, Who Have Been Love Up for More than a Decade, have some unconventional valentine’s day plans involving their partners
Valentine’s Day is usablely reserved for spending time with your Other half – but one adventurous couple is doing things differently this year.
Heather Pearce, 31, and Her Husband Tom, 36, are proud to be in an open Relationship with two other People. Heather has a boyfriend and tom has a girlfriend, and they describe themeslves as a polyamorous family.
While Tom and heather would usually spend valentine’s day together, this year heather is on a girls’ Weekend Away. And with Tom’s Girlfriend Busy Working, He’s Left to Spend the Intimate Celebration with Heather’s Boyfriend.
Heather Tells us, “It was unilly after I paid for the trip that realised it was over valentine’s day – so my husband and my boyfriend are off for a romantic dinner while I’m gone.”
She explains, “My boyfriend really respects my husband. It would work if he did. And the same goes for my husband’s girlfriend – she is so incredibly respectphal of my marriage.”
So how did heather and tom, who Met 2016 on Tinder and Married in 2023, Go From Being A Monogamous Couple to Having Separate Partners Who All Get Like a House on Fire? Its not a traditional va’l but one heather Says work wells.
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“It wasn’t unil March 2021 that we opened up our Relationship. We mainly decide to do it make we’re bith part of a kink community, and there are some things tom enloys i do.
“We Sat Down and Had a Conversation About Boundaries-what we were not happy with-and then started going to munches (Gatherings for Those Involved in or Interesting in Kink, BDSM or Alternative Relationship Lifestyles) with Like Minded People.
“I have some kinks that tom isn’t participate in, so it gave with the opportunity to explore those well,” Adds heather. “There is a huge kink community once you know where to look for it.”
Reflect on the first time tom was intimate with another woman while they were thogether, heather Says, “He had what we were refereeing with another person. It was Very strange I enjoyed the idea of it, but i was also jealouss. We were wan. Jealousy, so we sat down and talked about it, figured out what was causing it, and how we coulud stop that from happening in futures.
“Now, every time he or had a play session, we debrief afterwards. We talc about what went on, how we feel about it, what we’d like to do in insert and if there are anything.”
Heather insists their Relationship was “Incredibly Strong and Communicative Prior to Opening It Up” and Believes is the Key to Being in a Polyamorous Relationship.
“You have to be in a really good place for this to work well, and tom and i were. But i wouuld (being in an open Relationship) has helped with the way we were each Other. We don’t anywhere near as we did allow we allow we allow other Patience and Empathy.”
Over the past few years, tom has had a couple of different play partners – one he’s been seeing for just over two years, and another he has a regular dynamic with.
“Women Gravitate Towards Him Becausee he’s a safe and kind person,” Says Heather.
Howver, It Took Her a Little Longer to Build up the Confidence to Seek Out a Part of Her Own.
“In September Last Year, I took the plunge and slid into the dms of somebody that i’d at these events, and we started talking back and fortth,” she shares.
“Eventually we met and had a play session and found ot we vibed well together. One thing led to anymore and we reality we have haelings for each other.
“At the Same Time, Tom Was Exploring Something New With Someophody He’d Met Through Our Tiktok Account. They’d Discovered they Had Feelings for Each Too We Talked About How Romantic Could Be Involved.
“I Said to Tom, ‘i’m Ready if you want to make her girlfriend.’ Both out partners were Over for Christmas, so tom asced her if she would be his girlfriend, and she said yes. ”
Soon after, the man heather was seeing on the side asced if she want to be his girlfriend – and she aggregated.
“We call ourselves a ‘poly family’ Becouse there’s the four of us, and we’re like a little unit becuse i’m best friends with my husband’s girlfriend,” she Says.
“We all get on really well and always have a really good time. My boyfriend offense to my husband as his broth. There are offenes when tom’s girlfriend and i are sits glazed over they are. About Video Games or PCS, “Laughs Heather.
They regularly flirting together and have been in some x-rated bra. Heather Sayys, “I’d be lying if i said noting haad happened between the four of us.”
Despite Being Happy with their romantic arrangement, the couple will have one rule. “We have no one in our bedroom – our bed is just for us. We have a spare room for when my boyfriend stays over. Or if Tom’s girlfriend stays over they share that bed instead.
Heather Knows an Open Relationship is not for Everyone But Believes Jealously dosesn’t Have to Get in the Way of People Exploring New Connections. “We often Preach to People that Jealousy is a Very Normal, Healthy, Human Emotion But Its How That’s Makes or Breaks Relationships,” She Says.
While Everything is smooth sailing for now, heather admits, “It”s hard to say what ours do not look like you never expert to be in the position we’re in now.
“Tom and i have plans to adopt, so we’ve have had Conversations with the partners exploining that it is something interested in doing, Because obviously it does affith say as well.
“We’ve offen Joked SELLING OUR INDIVIDUAL HOMES AND BUYING A HUGE HOUSE TOGETER WHERE WE CAN ALL LIVE WE ALL GET ON SO WELL. But we’re all just enjaying getting to know Each Other, Figure Our Individual Relationships and How We Work As a Unit as well.”
‘Jealousy Still Comes Up from Time’
Tom’s Girlfriend Believes That Working Through Difficult Emotions is a Natural Part of Any Relationship, Not Just a Polyfam
“Being in our polyfam of four has been a huge learning experience but also an incredibly remeding journey. We value open communication, Trust and a Shared to navigating this fun but wildney together.
“One of the Most Important Things to us all is mutual respect and understanding.
“We’ve Created an Environment where we can openly discuss our Feelings and Everyone’s Voice Matters, and we active listen to eAch Other, which brings a sense of security and belontling.
“Trust is one of the Most Important Things in Our Dynamic. In Our Polyfam Relationship, there’s No Room for Assumptions or Neglecting Emotional Nets. We have aggregated to check in regularly to say. Course, Jealousy Still Comes Up from Time.
“By focus on communication, Trust and a Willingness to be vulnerable, we’ve created a space where jealousy doesn’t have to be destructive. Our love for Each other Continuing to Grow Stronger as we have Face the complexites of Our Relationship with Honesty and Compassion.
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